I know…I know I AM a mom…I am Gracie’s mom and I always will
have that joy. However, on this
Mother’s day I do long for the days when I was actively taking care of my
little girl. No one can really know
how I feel, that is no one but Sadie.
My dear friend also lost her little angel to the same dreadful disorder
that Grace had. Our stories are so
similar and the resemblance is highly uncanny.
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| Sadie and Eva |
Grace was born in July 2010 and Eva in August 2010. They both left this Earth entirely too
soon. At the time, little did we
know that we were both going through the same types of struggles. Sometime after Grace passed, Sadie found
our blog and emailed us. For that,
I am eternally grateful to her.
Through Sadie we discovered the Manton Center for Orphan Diseases in
Boston. Eva’s DNA was already
enrolled in the study and later we were able to get Grace’s DNA enrolled in the
same study. Right now the
researchers are working on comparing Grace and Eva’s DNA samples and we are
hopeful that with our girls working together we just might find some
answers. In the meantime, Sadie
and I have both taken on the road to motherhood once again. Although this time our stories are much
different, I am hopeful that we will continue together down a similar
road. You see, Sadie is the type
of gal you can just call up anytime and she’s there for you. She’s ready to stop by and have coffee
or a glass of wine with you. I
only wish the distance in miles didn’t keep us apart.
Sadie is pregnant again and due in July. Recently she told me, “It’s scary when
you feel yourself falling in love again knowing what could happen but it’s
impossible not to love. I mean
that’s why we learned to breathe again after our girls passed, isn’t it? It’s because our love is so strong for
them.” Those words took my breath
away. Sadie is savoring every
moment of her pregnancy and enjoying every day she has with her little
boy. The both of us know all too
well that everything can change in an instant, and we have to be grateful for
what we have today….in this moment.
I feel in my heart that Sadie is meant to be a mom again and every day
that passes I grow more and more excited for her, knowing that she will soon be
enjoying her new baby boy!
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| Holly and Grace |
For Brien and I, we hope that taking the road to adoption
will lead us to the family that we so desire which includes another child. Right now though, I am thankful for the
family we have in the moment. We
have been blessed to have Brien’s daughter Brendle move in with us
recently. She is not a child
anymore, and we have been amazed to see what a responsible and intelligent
young woman she has become. I love
her just as my own child and am proud to be her step-mom!
Happy Mother’s Day to all and, may your day be filled with
Grace!
